me – The Big DumpTruck

It’s never good to get an email from someone with only two words and a link in it, if the two words are “Uhhh, Jody?”

So I have no idea why this person has sent me a link to a Huffington Post article (originally published in 2007, republished Saturday), until I get about halfway down, and see, much to my amazement, my picture. A picture I modified using Paint Shop Pro 3.5 years ago, that to this day floats around the internet as an example of a bad makeup job. Even though it’s not makeup, it was me playing with photo editing software. A photo that originally appeared here on the BDT on the day of my 40th birthday party, because I was wearing my birthday tiara.

Mr. Dump asked me if I was going to contact them for credit, and I said “Are you kidding me?” Here’s the thing. That’s not how I look. That’s not real makeup, and I don’t smoke. Do you think people will take the time to find that out? Do you think they will look at the original photo and the modified one and figure it all out? No, they’ll think I’m Tammy-Faye-Courtney-Love LaFerriere. And that would be bad.

On the other hand, I find it INCREDIBLY amusing that a photo of me is used next to one of JLo [update: it was changed from Reese Witherspoon] on a hugely popular multi-national website. I hope people don’t confuse us.

You know, all I wanted to do was have a nice quiet evening at home, eating snack foods and trying to figure out the perfect seed songs for Pandora so it will only play songs I adore. I actually have one good list going.

So Suldog tagged me and I’m supposed to respond to this chain letter meme and then drag many of you into it as well. I’m going to be kind of random about who I pick, so don’t feel bad if I leave you out. Feel blessed. And please God, no tagsies backsies. I will probably not do this again, because when I figure out how hard it is to find 7 people that I feel comfortable tagging, it makes me feel bad. Don’t make me feel bad, people.

Here are the rules:

1. Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.

2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog; some random, some weird.

3. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.

4. Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

HERE ARE THE SEVEN FACTS!

1 – I was once the Chief of Police in my town.

I won an essay contest and got to be the Chief of Police. I didn’t get to DO anything, of course, but I did get the grand tour of the station, and I got to ride in a cruiser to lunch with the Mayor for a day, my friend Kim, and the Fire Chief for a day, my sister Deb. We RULED! (The next year I won the Mayor for a Day role, but I think the Police Chief gig sounds much less plausible.

2 – I made a video of my gerbils and put it into a digital photo frame on my desk and it plays the video in a loop so that it looks like I have pets in my cubicle.

I think that one doesn’t need much clarification

3 – I have made it to age 43 without ever doing recreational drugs of any kind

I’m too afraid of going to jail to ever do anything bad – I’ve always had an unnatural fear of getting in trouble. I don’t like confrontation. It was easier to just avoid the illegal stuff – I had friends who used to smoke pot but they respected my not wanting to, and just never asked.

4 – Nobody has ever been able to teach me to play cribbage.

They have tried, and I don’t get it. I’m not stupid, I pick up games quickly, but for some reason I have a massive mental block when it comes to cribbage.

5 – When I ran a BBS back in 1987, there was a secret (!) section of it that contained ASCII porn. That’s right, pictures of naked people created using keyboard characters. Racy!!!

My current website doesn’t contain any porn. Trust me, I’ve looked.

6 – When I was a teenager I never wore shorts because I thought everyone was staring at my hairy legs.

I have dark, lush arm and leg hair. I’m apparently devolving back into an ape. Lucky me. Even when I shave, I feel like you can see it. Even though you probably can’t. But I refused to wear shorts because of it.

7 – Even though I own a dog upon whom the sun rises and sets, I don’t like any other dogs.

Other people: I don’t like your dog. I LOVE my dog, but he’s extraordinary. Yours is not. He is dirty and smelly and he’s just a stupid dog. Even when I’m standing with my dog right next to you, I don’t like your dog, I only like mine. I’m sorry, I’m just not a dog person. I’m actually afraid of dogs, although I’ve gotten much better. A growling dog used to reduce me to a sobbing mess.

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So those are my random facts. I’m sure I mentioned some of them here already. I left out a couple of juicy ones because, well, I have relatives who read my website.

I have to go leave them comments telling them they are tagged, but I’m going to go with

Tag: me

I Am Tammy Faye

Suldog Meme’d Me