The Big DumpTruck – Page 38 – Throwing Little Thought Pebbles at Your Windshield Since 1996

Festival of Lights

Posted on November 20, 2009December 20, 2015 by The Jody

I am sad to announce that I will not be able to decorate my house to the level that I would like to this holiday season. I would like to cover the house with so many lights that you can see it from space. Sure, the neighbors might not like it, but really, who can stay angry at twinkly lights? Nobody, that’s who!

I don’t own enough lights to accomplish my dream, nor do I have the manpower available to me to do it. I guess it will have to wait until after I become rich and famous. And have a lot more energy to do stuff like this.

I also pulled out the two shrubs that I normally put lights on every year. That seemed like a good idea until I realized I can’t put lights out on these shrubs any more because they aren’t there any more. Huh.

So last year, during the January “everything 75% off” sale at Target I bought a little fiber optic tree. Last week I tracked it down so we could see how tall it was. Not tall enough to use as our only tree, not by a long shot. But of course, now that it’s set up, I think I’ll leave it, just so I have a little something to make me happy. And here it is:

writing

NaNoWriMo 2009

Posted on November 7, 2009December 20, 2015 by The Jody

7000 words in, I finally have a plot. Or at least a purpose. And characters. The full plot will probably not reveal itself until the end of the month, meaning I’ll have a lot more work to do to get it into a finished state. Which, based on history, I will never do. I’m writing about my kid, his friend, and his cousins. It is fiction, I swear. My niece does not own a store that only sells cups and saucers. She’s 9 – owning a store like that is years in her future.

I don’t know why I keep doing NaNoWriMo, but I’m at the point where I almost have to do it, or I’ll feel bad about it. So I give up a few hours of my November, no big deal, right?

So while I’m working on this, please send snacks.

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Building 19 Used Car Salesmen Supplies

Posted on October 26, 2009December 20, 2015 by The Jody

On the off chance that you are looking for the “perfect” super ugly jacket to complete that zombie used car salesman costume you’ve been working on, Building 19 has a rack of some of the ugliest jackets I’ve seen in 30 years. Attached is a photo of my son modeling the “blue and peach striped 100% polyester” special. There is some major ugly on this rack (and the sign actually says “ugly jackets” for Halloween). Five bucks each, no questions asked. (We bought two. The red and black polyester hounds tooth makes my eyes water.)

Full disclosure: We went in there to look for a suit for my son’s magician costume. He wanted a tux, I said I wasn’t buying him one. On the “real” suit rack, right at the end, would you believe they had a “former rental” tux jacket with satin lapels for $20, and behind that a table with tux shirts (!) for $5? And the thing fits him like he was fitted for it. This place is better than the Salvation Army!

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Zombie Party!

Posted on October 24, 2009October 3, 2011 by The Jody

I really wish I had written a zombie novel. If I had, you would all want to read it because it’s the week before Halloween and that’s gotta be the busiest week for zombie novel reading, right? Maybe if I get started on it right now I would have it finished so that you could all read it. I would make a kindle edition for you, because I know that you are some kind of crazy technology addict. And for the people I don’t like, I will just mimeograph a copy for you, but not give it to you until after they don’t smell good any more.

That will teach you.

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Shot Time

Posted on October 21, 2009October 3, 2011 by The Jody

I get a flu shot tomorrow, but not the piggy or the swan flu shot. This is just regular old, “nobody cares about me because I don’t have a cool name and make the papers” flu shot. I am just hoping to get through the day and maybe not have any side effects from the flu shot. Like, say, the flu.

I was in a room today with a woman who sounded like she had gargled with Cup ‘O Virus. Thanks SO MUCH for being such a dedicated employee, and for entering the little piece of heaven that was the windowless and airless computer lab I was housed in. We all appreciated those noises you were making with your sinuses and your throat.

So if I DO get sick, I’m going to assume it was because of her, and not because of the flu shot. Unless it would get me more time off to say it was from the shot, in which case it most certainly was.